Sunday, August 08, 2010

one of the bad days 4

how pressured a medic student could be:
VERY EXTREMELY RIDICULOUSLY TREMENDOUSLY SEVERELY STRESSED & STRAINED TO THE MAX!!!!!!!and i mean it :(

the final exam will start next saturday, 14th august...one week to go...i'm getting stressed & stressed day by day...terase nk botak kepala, luruh segala rambut, kedut segala kulit, kecut segala otak...huhuhu...tension!!! if only i could stop the time...and sleep peacefully...i need to breathe, without having any stress, fear, anger or any negative feelings...huhuhu...

*if only im a time traveler, i nk pegi masa2 yg aman damai hepy riang gumbira...
*if only i anak raje, i'd stop studying and balik msia dgn hepynye, and bile ade mood nk study or exam bru dtg cni blk...yes yes, if only boleh study bile ade mood je...and not all the time...please god ease my burdens here!!!!!!

if only!!! bab ank raje tu yg paling appealing skrg...i need a break!!! xnk exam!!! huhuhu...i wonder if other students taking other major were studying like me...like us freaks...do u? :( ade x mane2 manusia yg study bile ade mood je? ade x yg xpayah sampai nk pakse2 diri study? ade x yg perasaan dorg relax je dpd mula course smpai la dh grad? ade x? :( nk nangis kejelesan bile pk psl ni...ade x? kalau ade, nk pegi tarik2 rmbut dorg smbil suruh bersyukur sgt2 xterjebak dlm kancah medic ni...gile wey~ gile~

skrg ni terase mcm askar nk pegi berperang...and somehow this saturday lebih krg mcm hari bertempur...berdebar setiap mase...terase mcm akan mati dek kene hentam bom & peluru bertubi2 nanti...im preparing my own weapons and protections too...but hey, maybe there're just some simple rifles & machineguns instead of freakin grenades or bazookas...jauh sekali ke tahap chemical weapons kan...wut do u expect huh...wish i could mug up all the things in the book...i wish my brain works like a supercomputer all the time...i wish...heh...

terase jugak mcm the only survivor in a zombieworld...or some planet of the mutants/aliens...tgu mase nk mati je...i'm so dead...terase nk serah diri, biar kene baham abis2...ambik jela aku zombie...malas nk pk...malas jugak nk lari...biar the end cepat2...huhuhu...xpun konon2 terkurung dalam rumah berhantu, yg hantu mmg giler nk makan org je...the ju-on versi cannibal...deym, i'd just let her suck my blood...dah xlarat nk terkejut2...or tgu dlm keadaan jantung nk tercabut...xlarat nk jerit, xlarat nk tahan jerit...

huhuhu...but its true...when u feared sumthing so much, kalau dah banyak kali sgt dok takut, and survive slalu, walaupun dgn hecticnye, lame2 bosan dh nk takut2 pun...and wuts more worse than that is u'd lose the fear and end up taking things for granted...u dont feel like fighting anymore...dh bosan...okay, i dont even knw wut i'm typing, tgh serabut giler ni...

i should stop
and get some sleep
*terase mcm nk gila la...seriously...i have this vague vision of me in an asylum...wearing all white...with the background song of Behind Blue Eyes...konon2 the gothika...ahahahah...ok dah2, merepek dh ni...
*another if only ----- if only im not afraid of failing...
*if only exam is just a simple matter to me...
*if only life is that easy :(
*maybe im not supposed to be here :( maybe...
*tido*

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